James 4:6-17 | Surrendering Self in a Selfie Society

James 4:6-17 Surrendering Self in a Selfie Society”

Big Idea: “True freedom and transformation in a self-centered world come through humbling ourselves, surrendering to God’s authority, and receiving His abundant grace.”

We are broken. We hurt those we love, live with regret, and readily see our failures

We are powerless. Try as we might, we cannot fully fix ourselves or undo our past.

Embrace Grace: would solve the vast majority of mental illness. Why? (root is spiritual)

1. Grace frees us from shame
2. Grace is our only tool to transformation
3. Grace removes performance
4. Grace inspires us to extend grace to others

Without grace, people end up in one of two destructive places:

1. Prideful Self-Righteousness:
2. Resentment or Bitterness (for myself and others)

V.6B Our problem is pride

v.7 Solution: Gives an offensive and defensive strategy for the path to humility:

1. Submit to God – actively place yourself under His authority.

2. Resist the devil – defensive strategy. Antihistēmi means to oppose or put the block on.

3. V.8-9 repentance and godly sorrow. Repentance is a change of mind that leads to a changed life. James describes what true humility before God looks like:

• Cleansing hands = External repentance.
• Purifying hearts = Changing desires by making no provision for sin.
• Mourning over sin = Taking sin seriously, because it ultimately grieves a holy God.

v.10 The result of humility: Grace and victory. Jesus says the humble will be exalted.

V.11-12 The practice of humility: how we treat others in light of these verses. When we slander or judge others, we elevate our opinions above God’s Word and assume His role as the Judge.

V.13-17 What this looks like in our own life. Humility realizes that our lives are in his hands.

OT Case study: Slave girl and Naaman the Syrian 2 King 5:1-3.

Diagnostic Questions (James 4:6-10 & Naaman’s Story)

These questions help us self-reflect on areas where pride may be blocking God’s work:

🔍 Resistance to God’s Way:

• Where in my life am I demanding that God work on my terms instead of surrendering to His?
• Have I ever thought, “That’s beneath me,” like Naaman rejecting the Jordan River?

🔍 Self-Sufficiency & Control:

• Do I only pray when I’m desperate, or do I daily depend on God?
• Am I trying to fix my own problems instead of seeking God’s wisdom?

🔍 Reluctance to Confess & Repent:

• Do I struggle to admit when I’m wrong?
• When was the last time I truly grieved over my sin (James 4:9)?

🔍 Lack of Submission to Authority:

• Do I resist biblical teaching or dismiss advice from godly people?
• Like Naaman, have I ever thought, “I know better” when someone pointed me to truth?

Questions Parents Can Ask Their Kids to Discuss the Message:

1. How do you think pride can keep us from getting the good things God wants for us?
2. Why do you think God exalts (lifts up) those who humble themselves?
3. The slave girl showed kindness to someone who didn’t deserve it (her enemy). Why is that so hard to do? Can you think of a time when you had to do something like that?
4. Naaman almost missed God’s blessing because of his pride. Can you think of a time when being stubborn or prideful kept you from something good? What did you learn from it?
5. What are some ways you can “draw near to God” this week? How do you think that could change your attitude or your actions?
6. Is there someone in your life who might need to see grace or kindness from you? How could you show it to them?